Running From the Predators

You listen the way a child listens. In defiance with hands over ears and eyes closed. On the verge of throwing a temper tantrum and running from the punishment. Bargaining and shifting blame. Broken promises. Making deals with the devil. Contract signed, sealed, and delivered in blood. Is it your blood or that which you have sucked from others? Some veins have been bled dry.

Don't worry about keeping up. I can still see you way back there. Not really trying. Do you want me to go back for you? Do you want me to wait? Of course not, you like walking alone. I'll see you at the finish line, my friend.

P.S. There still might be a chance afterall.

Honestly, I didn't mean to lie! I swear!

When people stumble across my blog in search of the "real" truth, I thought it would be interesting to pose some questions. Questions that we can ask Mayo, Loveman, anons, and most importantly ourselves. I told you I analyze everything and my thoughts run deep and dark so here is what I've come up with. Step up and dare to answer if you choose. Remember you're only lying to yourself.

Can you look at yourself in the mirror without looking away?
Do you have any regrets?
Have you ever hurt anyone you cared about?
Do you lie? To yourself? To Others?
Have you ever let your mother down?
Have you ever seen your father cry?
Are you scared of something?
Do you feel lonely?
Have you ever said something you wish you could take back?
Do you use people?
Have you ever said "I Love You" and not meant it?
Have you ever helped someone do something that you knew was bad for them just so they wouldn't be lonely and you wouldn't feel alone?
Are you bitter?
Do you take life for granted?
Are you a stranger in your own house?
Do people really know you?
Have your feelings ever been hurt?
Do you feel ugly?
Are you incapable of letting others love you?
Do you think a lot?
Have you ever wanted to make it all go away?
Does your conscience make you feel dirty?
Do you think you're crazy?
Have you ever bargained with God?
Are you at war with yourself?
Would someone name you as their one true friend?
Do you feel guilty for wanting more?
Are you addicted to something?
Are you sure?
Do you wish you were someone or somewhere else?
Do you miss someone?
Can you fix the mistakes you've made?
Have people cried for you?
Have you ever left something unresolved?
Have you ever taken credit for something you didn't do?
Does your pride get in the way?
Will you let yourself be happy?
Do you hate someone?
Can you sleep peacefully?
What have you accomplished?
Do you still have dreams of your own?
Have you listened to anyone lately?
Could you save someone?
Would you try?
Could you do better?
Have you ever sold someone out?
Do you scream so loudly that you drown out the voice of reason?
Do you like living so close to the edge?
Do you think others are weak?
Do you know what you're capable of?
Do you want to throw it all away?


P.S. Devil on one shoulder...angel on the other....caught in the middle.

Let's Go Back to the Beginning of the Middle of Day

This all started innocently for me on buzznet. There I found Loveman's blog and the rest is blog history. People have been begging me to create my own blog so here it is. I'm no writer. Hell, I've never even kept a journal or a diary. Not in last 20 years anyway. The last diary I had was pink and I must have been around 8 years old. I didn't write in it buy maybe 3 times. I suppose my trust issues existed even back then. I mean what could an 8 year old have to say that would have been so secret??

Anyways, here I am. Now that you guys have called me out. I'm gonna give this a try and let's see how much I really have to say. This has been great fun meeting all of you and finding out there are people out there kinda like me. This has been the best therapy ever.

My thoughts run deep and dark. I will analyze the hell out of any situation. I love to argue different points of view. When I love, I love hard and forever. I'm pretty fucked up you could say. But hell, I wouldn't have it any other way.

P.S. Smoke&Venom20, Sister Midnite, Ergoproxy, Kapunua, Bleeding Chaos, and all my Anon Friends: You guys can play kickball in my blog any day! Special Treats for all!